CAPTAIN CITRUS? HOMOPHOBE ANITA BRYANT MIGHT BE A BETTER IDEA

Captain Citrus TrioSometimes I wish I could be in the meeting when an advertising idea is first born. You might see brilliance, like the Nike “Just Do It” campaign. Or a complete dud like the McDonald’s “I’d Hit It” campaign for the double cheeseburger.

I really wish I could have been in the room back in 2011 when the Florida Department of Citrus first came up with the roly poly “Captain Citrus” campaign. The idea was to get more kids to drink orange juice. But the campaign fell flat.

So the Department of Citrus went back to the drawing board and this year decided to pay Marvel comics $1 million to update Captain Citrus into a lean, mean, chiseled, hunk of man. I’m not sure seeing Captain Citrus fighting alongside the Avengers will make kids want to drink more OJ. Alas, I think kids today are more sophisticated than to fall for that. But he’s kind of hot so maybe the gays will be filling their carts with OJ.

The Orange Bird Album I Once Sang Along To

Not surprising that the agency came up with this idea, after all this is the agency that hired homophobe Anita Bryant to push their product in the 70s. Heck, they even paired her up with the animated “Orange Bird,” complete with a sing-a-long record created by Disney. (Sad to report my mom and dad actually bought me the record and I do remember singing along to it.) Disney also had the Orange Bird outside their Tiki Hut attraction.

So, thank you Florida Department of Citrus for continuing the grand Florida tradition of “what the…” when it comes to marketing.